Full Name: Jose Canseco Capas Jr.

Bash Brother #2, 'Roids, Douche

Screen Name:

Claim to Fame:
Hitting a home run with my head

Current Residence:
Certainly not Obscurity

Greg Anderson, and a guinea pig named Balco

What are you reading now?
My own book, Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant 'Roids, Smash Hits, and How Baseball Got Big, for the 294th time

Favorite fast food place/restaurant?
The pretzel stand at Fenway.  No, not that one - the other one

What’s your favorite game?
Kill the Man with the Career

Favorite song?
"I'm an Asshole" by Dennis Leary

Favorite sexual position?
As long as I hit a home run, it doesn't much matter.  Ole!!!

Favorite drink (non-alcoholic)?

Favorite drink (alcoholic)?
Juice w/ bourbon

Favorite smell?

If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
Joseph McCarthy Red

What’s under your bed?
One elephant for every fiber of morality I possess

What’s the first thing you think of in the morning?
"This impotence thing is KILLING me!"

Where is the best place you have ever been?
The Baseball Hall of Fame (visitor)

Worst place? France

Pet peeves?
living a lie, letting others live a lie, not making a profit from letting others live a lie

What would you say is your best characteristic?
My twin brother Ozzie

Worst characteristic?
My hair

If you could meet someone, dead or alive, who would it be?
My old manager, Kevin Kennedy, to ask him WHY THE HELL he let me pitch the 8th inning in that Sox game in 1993 when I asked him.  Seriously, that has to rank among to dumbest managerial decisions in the history of baseball

Do you believe in UFOs?
No, those are baseballs I've hit that still haven't come down

What did you do on your last birthday?
Got traded to a different A ball team

If you could have any job, what would it be?
A sock puppet

What is the most important thing in life? Never slipping from the spotlight, no matter who you must crush to stay there

What is your greatest fear? My head shrinking

Have you ever been in love? Yes, but then he had to go and break Maris' record and he had no time for me anymore

What is your motto? Cheating is fine if you admit to it LONG after the fact

What would you like to be remembered for? My stint on The Surreal Life 5.  That and the fact that I'm one of only 6 players in Major League History to hit a fair ball that got stuck in a stadium obstruction.  OLE!!!!



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