Disclaimer –Derek's work has been registered at the U.S. Library of Congress, so it would be a terrible financial idea to plagiarize or use any of the material found on this website for your own purposes. Nevertheless, enjoy the writing!
Kiss Me, Kate (1994) – (no blurb)
Exit the Body (1994) – This is Derek’s seventh high school production, but only his second acting attempt. He was last seen in Kiss Me Kate. Because of this, he can’t list a zillion underlined play titles. Instead, he would like to make some thank yous. “Foo-Bear, Twiggy (be my head and I’ll be yours), JG (wish you were here), MK (you make me want to polka), the TRUE Dew Crew, MD, LN, LD, TW, RP, The State, and everyone named Al. Hope you enjoyed the blurbs.”
Anything Goes (1995) – “Ukelele” is a good word to start a blurb. This is Derek’s third Gold Masque endeavor. He has performed in Kiss Me, Kate and last fall’s Exit the Body. In his spare time, he juggles small domestic animals. He sends a bushel of thanks out to Doug, Jaclyn, Chuck, Twiggy, Brrff, Foo-Bear, Becky, and Jo-Jo. “If at first you don’t succeed, so much for skydiving.”
A Chorus Line (1995) – Derek has been seen in Anything Goes, Exit the Body, Kiss Me, Kate, in the shower, and has had numerous cameo appearances on C-Span. Summer activities include yeti impersonations and ceasing to exist. A heart-felt thank you goes out to Jaclyn, without whom this blurb would have been shorter, and a thanx to Gipple Guy (come back, little bunny.) Capture the Spam!
Rehearsal for Murder (1995) – November 16, 17, and 18 are momentous days indeed for they mark Derek’s FIFTH blurb. You may have seen him wearing a dance belt in A Chorus Line, tights in Kiss Me, Kate, overalls in Exit the Body, or undergarments in Anything Goes. “Tang, it tastes like Tang.” Sadly, this may very well be Derek’s final high school performance and (sniff) his last opportunity to wear make-up. An elevator of thanks should make its way to Christina (for actually not slapping me… too hard), Twiggy, Brrff, Chuck, Toastette, JoJo (for three wonderful shows), Foo-bear, Robespierre, all of his friends, and some of his vital organs. Funkwatt! Aaa!
Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (1996) – Welcome back to “This is your Blurb” with our special guest, Derek Sonderfan. Derek, you have been in six shows at Ramapo High School. You starred in Hard Pavement, Soft Brains, and relished your little stint on the All-Applause Network. You dedicate this, your final show, to JoJo because mono prevented her from showing off her talents. You thank Sis, the Kumquats, your folks, and Slip-Lik-Ned. Because of this, you win this FABULOUS ARMCHAIR!!!
Godspell (1996) – Rather than look back, let’s look left, then right, then left again. That way, we can cross the street! Thank you Chuck, Emma, Chuck, Allyson, and the walruses.
Crazy for You (1996) – Abbreviations: DS (aka DPS) is so slap happy to be a part of CFY. He has also appeared in ETB, ACL, and G, among others. Next year he’ll be starting his BA in TA at PSC in NH. Thanks to KG, EJM, TS, WK, O, M and D, NP, VCR, WWF, and his true love EB. Remember, ELALBWTAAHPOS.
Close Ties (1997) – Looking briefly at Derek Sonderfan, you may realize he is a new face for a Players production. Looking a bit closer, you may discover that Derek has been involved with the theatre for many years, having performed in such plays as A Chorus Line as Gregory Gardner and Crazy for You as Lance Hawkins. Upon even closer investigation, you might be able to conclude that he hails from Wyckoff (an Indian word meaning “hard to spell”) and he plans to major in Theatre and minor in Creative Writing. If you look any closer, you can actually see his cerebellum. He would like to thank KB, The Players and his family, without whom this sentence would have ended with “thank”.
Barnum (1997) – “Stop following me. I mean it. Get away. I don’t have anything to say about Derek Sonderfan. I’ve never met him. Never heard of him. Now go away.” –Sean Connery
Prometheus Production’s Evening of One-Act Plays (1997) – As a Theatre major at Mason Gross School of the Arts, Derek is fascinated with unusual and innovative theatre, and he’s thrilled to be a part of Kevin’s career initiator. Also a writer and musician, Derek hopes that this is the first of zillions of likewise productions. Enjoy the shows.
The Unusual Suspects - Prometheus version (1998) – Welcome to www.dereksblurb.com. To see Derek’s resume, which includes “Anything Goes”, “Richard II”, and the Prometheus’ original “An Evening of One-Act Plays”, click here. To browse through his playwright and directing files, visit www.firsttime.com. To view his immense list of thank yous, click here (included are Kevin, Dierdre, Bryan, Derek’s family, and many others). To see nude pics, visit www.aaronsblurb.com.
Guys and Dolls (1998) – Guys and Dolls marks Derek’s 11th show with OnStage, his 10th show with Doug Gipple, his 12th overall acting endeavor, and his 2nd time playing a drunk in 6 years. After some math, we find that Derek has been involved in 15,840 shows in the past six years. It’s time to retire.
Two Weeks: Two Worlds (1998) – (no blurb)
Balm in Gilead (1998) – (no blurb)
Richard II (1999) – Derek Sonderfan, a Wyckoff, NJ native, is seething with joy to be a part of Richard II, his first mainstream production. He was previously seen as Al in the BFA production of Balm in Gilead. Derek is also interesting in writing, music, and respiration. He would like to thank everyone who ever existed for their unwavering support. Without them, Derek wouldn’t be here today.
How Horribly… (2000) – Inspiration comes in many forms: poetry, music, art, the Ernest movies. Derek has drawn from all of these (except poetry, music, and art). It is this inspiration that has made this show possible, as well as The Unusual Suspects, which Derek also wrote. In terms of acting, Derek has been in every Prometheus show, as well as six plays at Mason Gross, where he is involved in a four-year scheme to trade 130 credits for a degree. Thanks to Spoons, Foo-Bear, DDS, Kevin, MVB, and his cast and crew.
All in the Timing (1999) – (no blurb)
Hypothetical Realities (2000) – Derek is a piece of trash. Seriously. I mean, he calls himself a writer after receiving one stupid award for his play The Unusual Suspects. Whoopie. This blurb is better than his freakin’ play. And an actor? Hah! He goes to Mason Gross School of the Arts! Yay! What has Avery Brooks done since Star Trek? Oh, and he’d like to dedicate Stalemate to Scott for all his work. Oh how sweet… come on! I’ve dedicated better fishtanks to nursery schools. Ah, forget this.
The Groves of Academe (1999) – (no blurb)
The Nature of Man (1999) – (no blurb)
Measure for Measure (2000) – Mason Gross has seen a lot of this North Haledon NJ native, perhaps too much in Groves of Academe and Richard II. Outside MGSA, Derek co-founded a production company called Prometheus Productions, for which his play, The Unusual Suspects, won Best Original Production from the RECT committee. Derek thanks his family, Bryan, El Nino, and BFA IIIs.
The Good Doctor (2000) – Derek Sonderfan is from North Haledon, NJ. The Good Doctor marks, alphabetically, Derek’s second show at Mason Gross, although he’s appeared in Measure for Measure and Richard II (mainstage), the Jameson Project’s The Groves of Academe, and the BFA projects Nature of Man and Balm in Gilead. Derek would like to thank all the big people who made this possible.
Realizations (2000) – For almost six centuries now, Derek has been writing plays for global production, using such pseudonyms as Ben Jonson, Moliere, and Clifford Odets. Only recently has he finally cast away his shell of anonymity to reveal himself as the head writer for Prometheus Productions with such shows as The Unusual Suspects, How Horribly…, and Stalemate. (He’s also acted under the nom de plumes Richard Burbage, Paul Robeson, and Sir Laurence Olivier.) Thanks to his Angel, his Spoons, his DDS, and Fatboy.
The 1st Annual Improv Awards (2000) – (no blurb)
The Unusual Suspects – Mason Gross Version (2001) – A simple recipe to make your own Derek Sonderfan: six parts Mason Gross productions, two parts fish sticks, ten parts nasty shirts, one part Prometheus Productions, one part dill, five parts plays (written, not shaken), two parts thank you (to Caroline and Spoons), three parts ozone, two parts sausage. Stir violently. Let sit for proper “gestation” period. Add garnish.
The Glorious Path to Self-Discovery (2002) –
Esoderek Sonderfan (Writer) – Not to be confused with mild-mannered actor Derek Sonderfan, this writer has written half a dozen plays that have been produced by Prometheus Productions, a group Esoderek co-founded. Two of them, The Unusual Suspects and How Horribly… went on to win RECT awards for Best Original Production. He thanks Aaron for naming him.
Derek Sonderfan (Toe) – This Mason Gross graduate has acted in close to twenty plays in the past eight years, including several Esoderek pieces and, oddly, two of Shakespeare’s works. Despite what the tabloids say, he is in no way affiliated with the rambunctious Esoderek Sonderfan.
Stalemate (2003) – There is nothing more alluring to Derek than the prospect of utter failure in public. Of course, he hopes to disappoint not only himself in this venture, but you, the audience as well. If he fails at failure (as he narrowly did in last year’s Glorious Path…), he would like to thank Tracy, Aaron, and all his friends. If he succeeds at failure, he has no one to thank but Bryan because, as he was taught, “you can only work off what you’re given.” But know, in all sincerity, that he’d never try anything this insane with anyone else.
Equals (2005) – Fernando McGillicutty: commissioned on May 17, 2005 to pen playwright Derek Sonderfan’s bio, Fernando clearly misunderstood the objective of a bio. He (Fernando) makes a terrific grilled cheese sandwich and is deathly afraid of bats.
The Naughty List (2005) – After besting Shakespeare in straight tennis sets, destroying Oscar Wilde in a game of Jenga, and just edging out Moliere in a hot-dog eating contest, Derek is proud to be showcasing his actual skills with the 13th Street Rep. For more details about this playwright, visit www.esoderek.com.
The Unusual Suspects – Fringe version (2007) – Having successfully not written Troilus & Cressida, Derek is giddily debuting The Unusual Suspects at the Fringe Festival. Prior NYC shows include The Naughty List (13th Street Rep.) and Equals. He has penned the plays Stalemate, How Horribly…, and co-wrote the movie Two Weeks: Two Worlds, each debuting with Prometheus Productions, a company he co-founded, all while finding time to perform comedy music, irreverent stand-up, and illustrate, with meticulous aptitude, the art of the run-on sentence. Visit www.esoderek.com.