Having relationship troubles? Are there family disputes in the house? Do you not know how to construct that shelving unit? Unsure of how many centiliters are in a mile? Don’t know how to hide that extra arm? Then this column is for you!

If you have any problem for which you need advice (always unhelpful and often destructive), then send your comment along and our own resident Fats will surely post your question and his unhelpful answers. If you have such a question, click here.

10/30/2012 - The Not-Enough-Questions Question (NEW!!!)
07/1/11 - Fats' Fresh Three-fer
05/05/11 - How To Fully Capitalize on Single Life
1/21/11 - Dissecting Vasectomies
9/03/10 - Veggie Tips
5/20/10 - Looking Busy at Work
3/22/10 - How to Multi-task in the Kitchen
6/26/09 - The Wedding Wonderment Whuuuah?
12/19/08 - Cell Phone Etiquette
12/9/08 - Where to Pick Up Hot Womens
9/24/08 - The Promises Problem
5/13/08 - For Ladies Only: How to Play THE GAME
3/27/08 - The Second Date Dilemma
2/27/08 - Tips on Stalkers
1/7/08 - How to Remove Snow
10/9/07 - Fats Breaks Down the ALDS
4/11/07 - How to Eliminate Imposters
3/17/07 - Sticking It to Insurance Companies
2/27/07 - Wedding Party Issues
2/13/07 - The Co-worker Coitus Connundrum
1/24/07 - The Everybody-Wins Break-Up
1/2/07 - New Year's Resolutions
11/20/06 - The BYOB problem
11/10/06 - Car Repair Help
10/19/06 - Getting Back in Good Graces
10/4/06 - A Life of Perfection
9/27/06 - How to Surprise Someone
9/6/06 - Grammar and Wedding Advice
8/4/06 - Cancer Sticks - Yes or No?
6/29/06 - Impressing General Populace
6/21/06 - Getting a Cheap Flight
4/26/06 - How do I stop my sandwich from leaking?
4/16/06 - An Unwanted Siamese Twin
3/17/06 - Fixing poor vision
3/3/06 - The Boyfriend Crap Problem
2/15/06 - The Party Dilemma
2/6/06 - How Do I Make a Killer Ham Sandwich?
1/23/06 - Am I Fat?
12/28/05 - Is there anything I can do to slow the universe's expansion...?
10/16/05 - How can I keep my drinks cold while on the disc golf course?