Eliminate unwanted pests the easy way. Simply train your poodle to run towards skittering insects, rats, spiders, or whatever your annoyance and velcro our handy. each-one-is-unique, monogrammed blackhole to your dog and – POOF! – pests be gone!
Tie a squirrel to a pivot point that you place in the middle of the street. Velcro paint brushes to your poodles each dipped in different bright color paints. Let them go chase the squirrel. Street art at its finest.
Now that you’ve figured out how to make a poodle house, it’s time to see if the wolf can blow it down. We don’t know. It’s not in the tale. Simply write to your local animal sanctuary making sure to write your home address somewhere in the body of the letter. Velcro wolf phermones to the outside. Soon, a wolf will be intrigued by your letter and after learning your address, he will secure passage to your house. Note: If your grandmother comes visiting, this may be the wolf.
Go to Six Flags. You know how dogs love riding with their heads out the window? Velcro him into the Viper ride, but only if he meets height requirements. Safety first, after all. Make sure to buy the commemorative photo afterwards.
Missing a wall but don’t want to pay a contractor or a mason to fix your mistake temporary issue? With just the right amount of poodles and velcro, you can fix anything. Simply stack poodle then velcro in your choice of patterns: running bond, stack bond, soldier course, or Flemish bond.
Go to Rochester. You’ve just doubled their tourism! They’ll give you the key to the city. Use that to break into City Hall. Replace the gargoyles statutes with Velcroed poodles. You’ve just doubled their architecture! They’ll give you another key to the city. Really, they give those things out to just about everyone; they have a stack of them lying around somewhere.
Want to remove a weight-bearing wall without the hassle of permits and contractors? Leash a few playful young poodles to a pivot at the midpoint of your wall. Velcro a few sharp saws and maybe a laser. Leave them alone for an hour. When you come back, if the wall is still standing, you may need more time – or more poodles.
Go to Los Vaygiss. Velcro poodle to the top of the Lexor building. You’ve just made a signal for Poodleman. The citizens of Githam City will be safe and Commissioner Jordan will be most pleased. So will Ribbon, Batgal, and Elfred.
It’s Labor Day! Give your oppressed pup a break from relentlessly churning out Velcro. Take him to the park. He’s a good boy!
Go to Buckingham Palace. Swap the guard’s hats out with poodle hats with Velcro straps. See if the guy with dog allergies keeps his job.
Velcro poodle to the Zodiac Killer. Take photos. Now be honest: are those photos selfies?